I have learned to let go a lot of needing things especially tidy. Homeschooling three kids while owning two dogs and having a husband working from home means we live in this house; really live in it, day in and day out. My focus on “less stuff” means things are definitely easier to keep clean and picked up.
And then there’s my youngest.
My good friend was her pre-K/Kindy teacher, at a home-based Reggio-style program two mornings a week. I was complaining to her about how different this one was from my other two. “When the bigs played, they’d play with the Thomas the train set, or they’d play with Legos, or they’d play with the blocks…. when she plays, she plays with Thomas with the Legos with the blocks.” My friend just chuckled a little and said, “Yeah, that’s very Reggio….sorry about that.”
I love to see her amazing creativity (truly; I love it). But it is SO. HARD. for me to not swoop in every few days and put everything back where it belongs. My current tolerance level is about two weeks, which honestly I feel is not unreasonable, especially since by then she’s usually wandered on to something else. Right now we have Legos all over the dining room table (which I’ve had over a decade of practice with–that part’s fine by me). We have Thomas’s entire Island of Sodor in the middle of the living room floor, also including a handful of Legos, most of her fairy friends, and a friendly baby dragon. The dollhouse is also in the living room and occasionally gets pulled into the story, too. Her tiny bedroom stays clean for less than 24 hours at a time, because once it’s dealt with, it’s all open and lovely and she gets excited and immediately fills it up. Last week she learned she could move her bed by herself; it’ll never be the same again…..
That room, mind you, is the same one I was in love with just a few years ago; so empty and inviting. It’s amazing how things change once kids start developing their own opinions. 😉
In theory, we could move things out of her room. I do, with some frequency. But this is a child who, when deprived of paper, will simply use Kleenex, boxed for her convenience and sitting on her bookcase.
I’m having trouble balancing my Simplicity Parenting background with keeping her creativity fed and nourished. I especially hate for her room to be so trashed, when I feel like it needs to be reasonably clean for her to sleep peacefully (nightmares two nights in a row has got me really focused on this right now). I am someone constantly focused on simplifying and getting rid of stuff, and she is someone who seems happiest surrounded by stuff. Trying to figure out how to coexist will be an adventure over the years!
3 thoughts on “Minimalism vs. the six-year-old”
How about a calendar where you make a red X on the days she has nightmares and circle the days her room is minimally clean? If there’s a correlation between the mess and the nightmares, this may help you to show it to her.
The only reason I thought of this was that I had to do something similar to realize I had nightmares the day I cleaned…
This is an interesting idea! We just had another big clean out last week (though thankfully no nightmares this round). I might start trying this since we have a relatively clean slate to start with right now.
I hope you figure it out! Chronic nightmares are NO fun.